Hello! I’m excited to return to my original blogging roots and this new blogging platform. It’s been a busy and introspective year and I thought I would share the backstory on the books I’ve written—one in May, one coming soon.

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The past year has been rich with life. Rough translation: It’s been life-y. And also quite beautiful. Probably like yours.

Somewhere in late 2024, I found myself running low on energy and slowed my pace accordingly. It wasn’t enough. By the holidays, I was running on empty and not feeling very inspired as a yoga teacher (or anything else) but I simply didn’t have in me the thing I knew I needed to do for me. Not yet anyways...

There is a tradition in my church that the first Sunday of the year is called Star Gift Sunday and it is the day that we honor the Three Kings. Everyone (who wants one) receives a paper star with a word on it that becomes your word thematically for the year. It's kind of like kindergarten though. When you reach into the basket, you get what you get and there are no trade-zies or give backs. Nobody’s watching but I am a rule-follower to the core and “all-in” with what I get—most of the time.

So, on January 5th, I reached in for my star and I pulled out one that revealed my shiny new inspirational word for 2025: GIVING. What? You’ve got to be kidding. Seriously, I'm ticked because 1. I give more than enough (my perception) 2. I'm running on empty (have I mentioned?) and 3. Just no. 

Once the initial kicking and screaming subsided, I took a breath and a moment. In doing so, the clouds parted and a bit of rational mind and an idea took over—an epiphany on Epiphany. Crystal, how about GIVING yourself a break? And, after a few seconds of thought, that’s exactly what I decided to do. I gave myself permission to walk away from yoga teaching indefinitely and let my body and mind rest. One of the hardest and most necessary things I’ve ever had to do.

“When a door closes, a window opens.”

—Mother Superior (actually Alexander Graham Bell)

Now, my heart is always with a certain four year-old. Life will happen for her in the way that it happens for every single one of us and I know that, like us, she will someday have big questions. Here's the thing: I have big answers. And here's the other thing: Longevity was not on my parents’ side. My dad was gone at sixty nine and my mom was in the throes of Alzheimer’s around the same age. I have wondered and worried if I will be present (physically and/or mentally) to answer Eva's big questions when they arise. And so, in my period of rest, I started GIVING my words to paper. In time, pages became chapters and chapters became the book I always knew I would write. On May 27th, A Toolbox for Eva was published.

One of the first things that Shelley (the bestie) said to me was: “Are you gonna have a book release event?” My initial response was, “Oh, no, it's not that kind of book.” When people approached me about signing their book, I had a similar internal response. “This is crazy. It’s not that kind of book.” I actually once referred to it as a “nice potty read” and I kept responding in the same vein until it hit me one day: I have done a small thing with great love which, in the end, makes it not-so-small at all. In fact, it is beautiful and breath-taking and I am proud of it—words that don't easily spill forth from these lips. But it’s high time they did.

It’s funny, I once said to my husband that I felt “so ordinary” and he said, without missing a beat, “yeah, but you’re really good at it.” That’s how I regard A Toolbox for Eva. It won’t be a New York Times Bestseller or an Oprah’s Book Club assignment but it is extraordinarily good for an ordinary book. 

And there it is: me GIVING myself credit as a writer (albeit one of about 300 million others) but a writer nonetheless—and a good one at that. And with that, I am GIVING myself permission to keep writing.

So much of what I perceive to be my work in this world is actually not my work at all. I could’ve thrown myself on the sword and increased my donations or volunteered for one more thing—noble gestures indeed and I am guilty of both. But I would venture to say that I made the world a better and holier place by caring for myself a little more kindly, by creating something beautiful and by acknowledging the absolute goodness of my works.

That’s a lot of GIVING for one year. And it’s only September. I'll be curious to see how I work in the theme for the rest of the year. I have a few ideas and look forward to sharing with you.

Friends, above all things, I pray that these missives inspire you to GIVE yourself more readily the love you deserve. If I reach just one person, it will all have been worth it.

Thank you for being on this journey with me.

In peace, Crystal

PS If you’d like to receive my blogs or keep abreast of my writing endeavors, you will find all you need on my new website, www.crystalsullivantoolbox.com.